Things which matter most must never be
at the mercy of things that matter least.
~ Goethe
Years ago I read that Norman Vincent Peale
said to have made a ritual out of taking over-
whelmed men who were suffering from the
stress of the business of life to a cemetery in
New York. They would drive through all the
traffic, exit & step out of the car. This was a
very large cemetery where many important
people were buried. After discussing the
immense size of this huge display of markers
of all the important people, Dr. Peale would say,
"Take a look. All of these people thought the
world would stop if they didn't hold it together."
Turning around to the highway behind them full
of cars, he said, "but look. It's still going on in
a big way".
Hurrying has become a favorite pastime
of Americans. There's a certain status
level to hurrying / busy-ness. If you're
busy, you're important. On the highway
when someone rushes up behind me in a
cloud of "you're in my way", my kids would
be saying things like, "What a jerk!" to which
I reply, "Now, he's just VERY important".
And in his mind, he is.
It's called a 'Rat Race'. If you win, are you
the biggest rat? Is this really a dignified goal?
Are we forgetting what's really important here?
You know, when you drive in the car too fast, you
can't see any single thing out the side windows -
it's all a blur. When we overschedule our days,
It's easy to forget what's important.
In fact, when we can't do it all, we do the equivalent
of fall, cry & say,
"What's the point?" Actually, that's a very good question.
What IS the point?
Do you want to make a living or do you want to
make a difference? BOTH could be included on
your to-do list. Let's look at that to-do list.
Let's say it's a short but all important & time-
consuming one.
1. work
2. kids
3. sleep
Seems we left some things off. I've got some
magic for ya. First of all, write down & scratch
off "Hurry & Urgency". (Even if things weren't
on my original list....if I did 'em, I write them
on there & scratch 'em off.) The magic is that
when we stop hurrying & slow down,
time s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-s.
Becoming conscious / "coming-to" requires slowing down.
Making conscious choices requires that we be
conscious ---- awake!
Here are some other missing elements of your To-Do List:
Remember Peace......is it necessary? (....yes...)
How about Beauty, Hugs, Fun - NOT organized fun
for the kids where you spend 4 hours at a water park
comparing yourself in YOUR swimsuit to that person
half your age that you USED to look like....but REAL
laughs - get out & spray the water hose; out eating
with co-workers / kids: throw a fry at one of them.....
Take different roads to get where you're going ---
the SCENIC ROUTE. In some cases, the slow way is really
the express-way and the expressway is really the slow way
(to what's important).
Be impulsive / impractical.
Use the F-Word or if you always do that, learn a more
educated way of saying the same thing & use that!
I had a friend pop by the other day who asked, "Can
we meditate?" Sure. Got a call from someone needing
meditation music. Got it. We like it. We crave it, really.
We don't have TIME for it, but when we're conscious,
we ALLOW time for it.
I saw a panel of women being interviewed about dealing
with their daily To-Do Lists. A couple of them had great
tips on listing, prioritizing & choosing the top 3 choices.
Then one woman said she has standards & if something
comes up that is below her standards, she just doesn't
do it.
We can set new standards? Oh yes we can! It takes courage
to be a person with intentional transitions.
We're in the Time of the Gardener. You can't cram in a garden.
Slowing down doesn't mean you're not interesting or fun. Like in
many recovery programs, you will have to let go of something,
some ways, some people who don't make your new standard.
Saying no to something is saying "YES" to something else.
Say "no" to blind hurrying & over-booking your day.
Say "YES" to those missing elements not making your
To-Do List.
Include Peace, Fun, Love, Play, Reflection on your
To-Do List & experiment. You just might be surprised
at the magic of s-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n-g time.
Make some music & dance a bit!
When you dance, the whole universe dances.
~ Rumi
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